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i'm 15 and a sophomore and i'm also gay

i'm 15 and a sophomore and i'm also gay. I've never had a boyfriend but it's the only thing I want more than anything. sounds cliché but i'm serious. i'm more than ready to fall in love but i'm an introvert. a loner. I can't depend on anyone really. I have a few friends but in all honesty they have they're own clique so i'm just friends with them for the rest of the semester. next year i'm getting homeschooled unless I change my mind. I used to be a people person who everyone loved but I guess you could say I fell from grace. I grew out of that around the time I started middle school. so now my mother doesn't care about me anymore and sends all of her love toward my cousins who she wishes were hers. it doesn't bother me really. but I've been felling a lot more lonely lately. usually I could brush it off but it's been on my mind forever now. I don't exactly need friends really just someone to hold me and love me for who I am. my family thinks i'm going to grow up sad and alone forever and i'm starting to believe them. i'm not mean but sometimes I get irritable. when I came home from school today I felt like crying but still haven't cried yet. I keep thinking because i'm not as out going and friendly as I used to be as a child that being alone forever is my never ending punishment because I wanted to be alone so much. really don't want to be alone forever but if it's what I deserve then I guess there's no questions.
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Ditulis oleh: nissa sekar - Friday, October 4, 2013

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